HELLO. I AM ERIKA VIKTOR AND I WRITE HUMOROUSLY DARK THINGS

 

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What You Can Expect From This Blog

A lot of goofy writing. Writing advice. Funny videos. Updates. Conspiracy theories. Toy Giveaways. Bad sketches. Comics. A giant wooden man. Book reviews. Math Equations. Anecdotes. My philosophy on life. Interviews!

 

Early Life

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I was born with a typewriter for a head. I am, in fact, a victim of typewriter baby head syndrome. Do you suffer from typewriter baby head syndrome? Here’s how to tell:

1 – When you go to scratch your nose, you accidentally write a poem.

2 – Hats don’t fit.

3 – People keep pressing your buttons.

4 – You can’t stop writing.

Having a typewriter head made it impossible not to write stories when I am doing something as mundane as scratching my nose. It was horrible. Therapy doesn’t even help.

When I finally got the typewriter head removed, the world rejoiced. Actually, just me and some very weirded-out typewriter repairmen rejoiced. They mainly rejoyced because they hadn’t been employed for decades after computers got its silly fifteen minutes of fame.

For months I underwent intensive physical therapy. “No, touch they keyboard to write, not your face.” I had re-learn how to do most things like replace ribbon (no place for it to go), kearn my words, use aquanet . . .

But enough about me, let’s talk about you. How are you? Having a nice day?

Of course you aren’t. You are here, looking at my blog at –like—2 a.m.

 

What I Am Now

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I am three things. Some people like to call this the triforce of power. What? That’s taken? How about the Trinity? Taken too? How about the Stooges?tri

Yes . . . I am the three stooges of power.

For green pieces of paper (money) and personal fulfillment (fame) I am a writer, an antique dealer, and an art student. I am not sure which one of those is Larry, Moe or Curly. You decide.

Sigh. I hate talking about myself. But I have to. It’s my ME page. But I’d like to prolong this is much as possible. So, how are you? Weird weather we are having, right? I know! I was like “Jacket? No Jacket?”

 

Writings

I am published in several magazines. One of the most recent was an article in FACES (April 2014) and FOLIO Spring Edition (2014). Other places include: In Between Days Poetry Anthology, El Libro Raro, Utah Voices, Poetry on Canvas, Accolades and Albedo One.

I was also an extra in a movie called Mr. Atlas in 1997. You can see me during the bus stop scene. I’m getting on the bus. I almost won an award.

Antique Dealings

 

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Me and 4,000 antique chairs.

Its important we get this out of the way because it will probably come up a lot. I can’t get enough of antiques. I have been a dealer for 15 years now. Its never going to stop. But good news! All of my stories and books come out of the antiques I find here or there. My first novel Gabriel Gussie and the Muxy  features antiques with magical powers! My work in progress How To Be a Twelve Year Old Toy Killer features antique toys. The short story soon to be published digitally on Amazon deals with the large vents in the old house I just moved out of.

 

Other Things:

  • I have no cats. I know. This is practically the crime of the century for a writer.
  • I live in a mountain town. Last night I was visited by a raccoon.
  • I am the daughter of a female bodybuilder and computer-programming bass guitarist.
  • I like to get into an airplane and make myself sick for hours and stand in airports and drink bad tea. In other words, travel.
  • I have jumped out of an airplane, survived a tornado, experienced a perfect day, ingested a live beetle, and can predict when a car will explode in a movie with astonishing accuracy.
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Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

How about you? Reply and tell me about yourself!

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